Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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