If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
