do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
FUCK WHALES
Randomize
