In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
