i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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