Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
