My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
