I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
