Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
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