Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
