The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize