He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
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