What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
