My hair reeks of homosexuality.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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