operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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