Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize
