Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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