wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
A+ Viking dick
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
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