how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
Randomize
