i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
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