Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
