you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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