All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
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