i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
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