i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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