As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Randomize
