am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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