How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
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