If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Randomize
