We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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