we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I just want to make out with him forever
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Randomize
