I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
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