i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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