ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
