make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
this boner is exhausting
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
