but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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