They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
