Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
