Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
