I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I deserve this hangover.
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