You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
