My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Randomize
