sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
