cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
