She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
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