Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
