Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
