Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
