He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
