you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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