her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize
